Golo the Gloomy Goalkeeper
by Adrian Mitchell,
from Blue Coffee,Bloodaxe, 1996.
Golo plays for the greatest soccerteam in the Universe.
They are so mighty that their opponents never venture out of their own penalty area.
They are so all-conquering that Golo never touches the ball during a match, and very seldom sees it.
Every game seems to last a lifetime to Golo, the Gloomy Goalkeeper.
Golo scratches white paint off the goalposts' surface to reveal the silver shining underneath.
He kisses the silver of the goalpost.
It does not respond.
Golo counts the small stones in the penalty area.
There are three hundred and seventy eight, which is not his luckynumber.
Golo pretends to have the hiccups, then says to himself, imitating his sister's voice:
Don't breathe, and just die basically.
Golo breaks eight small sticks in half.
Then he has sixteen very small sticks.
He plants geranium seeds along the goal-line.
He paints a picture of a banana and sells it to the referee at half-time.
Golo finds, among the boot marks in the dust, the print of one stiletto heel.
He crawls around on all fours doing lion imitations.
He tries to read his future in the palm of his hand, but forgets to take his glove off.
He writes a great poem about butterflies but tears it up because he can't think of a rhyme for Wednesday.
He knits a sweater for the camel in the Zoo.
Golo suddenly realises he can't remember if he is a man or a woman.
He takes a quick look, but still can't decide.
Golo makes up his mind that grass is his favourite colour.
He puts on boots, track-suit, gloves and hat all the same colour as grass.
He paints his face a gentle shade of green.
Golo lies down on the pitch and becomes invisible.
The grass tickles the back of his neck.
At last Golo is happy.
He has fallen in love with the grass.
And the grass has fallen in love with Golo, the Gloomy Goalkeeper.
